Over the last week the girls have been painting their room. Sugar Belle had a little mishap when her roller slipped and hit the window, breaking it. As the girls were telling me all about how it happened, Tootle Bug said, “Then I said Moms going to kill you!" We had a little laugh about it, and I have to admit I didn’t think much about her statement. Any kid who breaks a window would have said “Moms going to kill me!” I know I would have…
A day or so later, Tootle Bug used that phrase again when she slipped and painted the other window in the room a lovely shade of blue.
“Moms going to kill me!”
I was starting to take this a little personally. Finally, I asked her why she kept saying that. Her response? “Well Mom…. You do get mad a lot.”
Knife. To. The. Heart.
But it was true. Life has been so busy, and busyness for me tends to lead to stress. Stress from busyness tends to make me feel pressured all the time, and when things go wrong…I get frustrated. Which is really the same thing as being angry, but it is more socially acceptable to be frustrated.
After retracting my application for Mother of the Year, I consulted Proverbs to see if I could find some help.
The discretion of a man makes him slow to anger,
And his glory is to overlook a transgression.
Proverbs 19:11
Now, as a mom I cannot overlook transgressions when it comes to direct obedience. However, I can overlook (or not get frustrated angry) when something happens that is accidental. I need to! I need to relax and remember that accidents happen, children forget things, and life is not going to run smoothly, especially when we are super busy. I need to remember what is important. It is important that my kids not grow up thinking that mom was mad all the time and that they were the cause.
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I recently read this quote by John Witherspoon and saw how perfectly it fit this thought,
"Nothing is more destructive of authority than frequent disputes and chiding upon small matters. This is often more irksome to children than parents are aware of." – John Witherspoon, 1723-1794
Many times Every time I get “frustrated” or “annoyed” or “react” to something insignificant not only am I damaging in some part my relationship with my kiddos, I am also damaging my authority. No wonder we’ve had a season of delayed obedience in our home!
Sigh… At these moments I wonder, will the Lord really say “Well done, good and faithful servant?” Thankfully the Lord doesn’t grow weary of me. Thankfully when I call to Him and ask him to fill me with His patience, He is faithful. Through His strength, I refuse to sacrifice my children and the relationship I have with them on the alter of anger and busyness.